You had me at dragon
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The Sarkash Dragon: a "What We Didn't Know" jam submission's itch.io pageResults
| Criteria | Rank | Score* | Raw Score |
| Theme | #33 | 3.632 | 3.769 |
| Overall | #34 | 3.484 | 3.615 |
| Written Tone | #36 | 3.484 | 3.615 |
| Visual Execution | #37 | 2.817 | 2.923 |
Ranked from 13 ratings. Score is adjusted from raw score by the median number of ratings per game in the jam.
Comments
Well written, and nice to finally have dragons enter The Dying World.
I love the tonality of the writing, and the Dragon Quests.
There are a few places where your writing could perhaps just be cleared up a little, like: "
Fanged Deserters increase Bite attack damage by one step." I know what you mean, but perhaps Fanged Deserters increase Bite Attack Damage to a higher die. Or maybe even leaving it out?
If I were to looks at the graphical side of things, I would consider you to try to simplify. Take the right hand side with the beautiful dragon by Tania, I think you could've fitted all the text around that dragon and left it in full opacity. :)
Congratulations with publishing a piece, there's a lot to be proud of, and I cannot wait to see your next one!
Submitted
The Mad Hatter's TeapartyA hundred steam-filled thanks for taking the time to read and post! It's wonderful to receive feedback.
I went back and forth on the wording for the Fanged Deserter bite attack bit. I did think about leaving it out, but also didn't wanted a Fanged Deserter player to feel left out rolling that result (getting such a boon is a big deal). Maybe something simple like "A Fanged Deserter's bite attack increases to dX".
On the graphical side, I can see that. But, hey, the first rule was that it couldn't be perfect, soI guess I nailed that!
The quest seems to works wonderfully. The reward of the dragon are peak for the upcoming adventure, even the suggestions for that one. I only think both arts don't look so good for me in the same sheet. Althoug Herrera's art rocks, the public domain art works perfectly in that map too.
Good work!
Submitted
Delirious Garnish Gourmet KnightYour welcome, thanks for the reply. :) it's a good motivation, it brought good content.
I can't think any other thing than just taking out the dragon at the right, and it still gonna look great. But i got a couple of examples if like: Lucifer of Eugene Delacroix for skills set from the Dragon of Sarkash, or any other public domain dragon that work in the background or even a small one next to the random tables.
The page already works, so is just details.
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