Play book
The Dog Star Blues's itch.io pageResults
| Criteria | Rank | Score* | Raw Score |
| Concepts & Originality | #1 | 4.545 | 4.545 |
| Flow & Clarity | #3 | 4.242 | 4.242 |
| Overall | #3 | 4.091 | 4.091 |
| Adherence to Theme | #21 | 3.485 | 3.485 |
Ranked from 33 ratings. Score is adjusted from raw score by the median number of ratings per game in the jam.
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Comments
Hello, Congratulations on being one of the top 3 in the writing jam! Please also send an e-mail to marketing@onepagerules.com so that we can send you your prize models! In the subject line please let us know that this was a top 3 placement!
Phenominal prose and use of language in this one!!!
I think this is the best one! A lot said in a few words. And the cliffhanger ending is great. I like this line, its deep, "War does not stop commerce; it only drives up the prices."
Ya, I work in war zones and I've seen that it usually drives up inequalities. Most people lose everything and a few merchants, smugglers, the local commander or politician, get very rich controlling the diminishing resources.
absolutely perfect. I love the individualism in the characters. And the end was the best
Maybe the best story I’ve read here so far. What an amazing concept and execution. That said if I could offer one point of criticism the connection to close enough tie in with the cards felt a bit forced.
That was a great story! I like the way it shows how destructive and pointless racial bias is without being preachy. Only the theme felt a little shoehorned in at the end though I can also see how the proximity to Sirius reinforces the idea. Overall, a very good entry.
Reading this was a delight. Your descriptive detail kept me on the edge of my seat. I could see the whole scene as if I were right there with your characters. Thanks!
Outstanding! Thanks for the great entry!
I really liked the characterisation and the mix of races interacting without violence! I got a real hardboiled detective noir vibe from all the similes/metaphors but that added to the sense of desperation and futility. I enjoyed it!
Best entry so far!
This might be the strongest entry I've read yet. Your prose really is a breath of fresh air, and you perfectly capture the sense of quiet desperation.
Really wonderful characterization. It's great how much backstory and intrigue you're able to get out of what's barely more than a grunt from some of the Fact's crew. I'd be eager to read more of this.
The only criticism I really see is that some of your similes are a bit labored; I don't think I can really imagine the way a punched lung drifts, or how a bruise squats. You get way more punch out of your excellent dialogue, I think.
enjoyed this story. Was very original and well written overall. Great job.
Very nice, sticks on point and good character interacts which are distinct, hard to do in such a short amount of space!
The depth of character that you were able to squeeze into this story--from the setting to the ship itself--was excellent. I really enjoyed this one.
I wish I were this good at writing. 5s all around. I am going to go rewatch all of the alien movies now.
Freaking 5-A. I'm a total sap for Fear and Loathing quantities of metaphors and junk stuffed into stories (especially short ones) and your ability to hand wave really complex ideas with a couple short sentences is very commendable. Mixing and matching races isn't very popular in the Grimdark genre for good reason but I think you really put together an interesting set of characters here!