Play short story
2987 V's itch.io pageResults
| Criteria | Rank | Score* | Raw Score |
| Overall | #7 | 3.083 | 3.083 |
| Artistic merit | #7 | 3.167 | 3.167 |
| Entertainment value | #8 | 3.000 | 3.000 |
Ranked from 6 ratings. Score is adjusted from raw score by the median number of ratings per game in the jam.
Word count671
Blurb
An unnamed being attempts to survive humanity.
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Comments
That was a nice read!
Personally I felt a bit disconnected from the character. There was a lot of rough struggling without going very deeply into the whys of it - the small dialogue bits that intercepted the action felt like they were added to give context to the character's suffering, which however also didn't go too much into detail and didn't explain it a lot. Because of that, the resolve also didn't fully feel relieving for me.
However, you really captured the desperate atmosphere and feelings of the character well with your writing style! :D
You are really good in creating a specific mood & athmosphere.
I really liked the themes of warping, restarting reality, but of course it felt also confusing, which seemed intended.
I personally find it exhausting to follow a protagonist that is completely desperate & cynical. It does not help that I really don't learn WHY the protagonist is desperate.
I appreciated the unbroken will through struggle, but I could not find any reason for the protagonist to struggle..
I pitty him, which means you got me emotionally involved - a good thing. I got the feeling the protagonist is a little too fixated. He is NOT searching value in himself or a value in the world. He seems to be driven by one goal & seems to despise everything else. He also doesn't seem to change. So I as a reader did not learn anything valuable from him.
Overall: I as a reader miss a moral/lesson & meaningful relationships. But I like your general writing-style, ability to create mood & also the worldbuilding, even if it felt a bit chaotic.
Thank you so much for the feedback!
Beautifully written story and nice format.
Thank you so much!