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Talia's Curse's itch.io pageResults
| Criteria | Rank | Score* | Raw Score |
| Select if this story if it was one of your top reads from the jam. | #10 | 3.062 | 3.750 |
Ranked from 4 ratings. Score is adjusted from raw score by the median number of ratings per game in the jam.
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Comments
A lovely story of high adventure! I especially appreciate how well you established Talia as a villain. The backstory was very engaging, and did a great job of characterizing the two fairies, as well as Queen Esperanza. Valeria's character does come alive as well, throughout her (his?) interactions with everyone.
Speaking of which, one thing that was rather jarring was Valeria's gender. I don't know if the constant gender flipping was intentional, as a way to establish this character as genderfluid, but if that was the case, I think it could stand to be more clearly spelled out. As it stands, it sounded a bit confusing.
But overall, the story was very exciting and entertaining. With some good editing (I did catch a few typos/mistakes), it has the makings of a classic!
Thank you for your comment! Only thing I wanted to clarify is that Valeria is a butch sapphic who goes by she/her and he/him interchangeably. I've met many people who go by he/she, I've even gone by he/she myself at one point (I go by he/they now) and I wanted to represent these kinds of people.
Thank you again for your feedback!
Beautiful story, loved the retelling of sleeping beauty and the relationship between Prince Valeria and Esperanza. Of all the characters though, Talia was my favorite for how tragic she was as a character and I wish there was some way she could have been saved.
Fantastic.
Queen Esperanza definitely interested me the most in this. All the characters felt developed, but particularly the part where Selena brings up the assassination plot, it did a lot to show how complicated Esperanza was, and how her people saw her.
I just felt bad for Talia the entire time, and I'm glad she was treated as more sympathetic. I would have definitely liked to get more on if there were other options for her. Because as it is, it feels like she was doomed to villainy by nature of having to survive, and thus being treated unfairly.
I liked how the magic was handled overall. Could have used some more elaboration on fairies generally, especially since we only really see (or hear of unless I'm forgetting something) Selena and Talia. But the use of magic throughout was fairly coherent rather than confusing.
Scene transitions could have used some work, but for the most part, I was able to follow what was happening as I kept reading (such as when Valeria thinks she's at her coronation when she's really sleeping).