Play chapbook
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Which category is your game in?
La Petite Mort (created in under 4 hrs)
What language is your game in?
English
Do you want to opt in or out from your game being archived at the IF Archive?
YES, please, archive my game
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Comments
Nice entry! The writing was mostly excellent, with strong imagery that repeated throughout. I especially loved advancing by selecting specific phrases. It reminded me of my own anxieties and fixating on specific phrases that I've thought or said. The casualness of the language stumbles in a couple of places, and while I understand the goal of the piece was to reflect the character's/my own aimlessness, it did result in an occasionally frustrating meandering. Especially going in and out of flashbacks. But the writing was vivid and kept me reading until the end. Great work!
Yay thank you for reading! Mm yeah meandering prose is a thing I often fall into - hopefully post-jam with some editing/cutting I can get a better sense of where it’s going across. Thanks for your feedback!