man, i feel really forlorn and unnerved listening to this track... you did a great job combining gritty foley and gentle synths to create such an atmosphere!! :~)
i think the ending was interestingly abrupt in that the shortness of it really adds to the feel of the melancholy atmosphere — the desire for freedom and yet it is cut off in such a frustrating, despair-inducing manner. i'd love to still hear the other work you originally planned for the jam!!