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A jam submission

Dragon disasterView game page

A failed experiment for Strawberry Jam 10
Submitted by Underwhelmers (@underwhelmers) — 22 hours, 38 minutes before the deadline
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Dragon disaster's itch.io page

Results

CriteriaRankScore*Raw Score
Stealth#213.3003.300
Novelty#243.4673.467
Horny#283.4673.467
Narrative#303.1333.133
Kink#392.7332.733
Play#432.5672.567
Overall#482.6332.633
Harmony#532.5332.533
Ambition#572.3332.333
Sound#591.1001.100
Aesthetic#601.7001.700

Ranked from 30 ratings. Score is adjusted from raw score by the median number of ratings per game in the jam.

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Comments

Submitted(+1)

Funny and sexy writing, oh how I wish to plunder that plump pussy. The tongue route was excellent. The card animations feel nice and smooth. Have a quick fanart:

Developer(+1)

🤯 lets all agree that having a sight like this masterpiece.

We would have a fuck-it or fuck-yeah dilema on our hands.

(It's a long way to say I'm overwhelmed with the feelong of gratitud) 😅

Submitted(+1)

I appreciate anything that normalizes treating sex with a good sense of humor.

Developer

I love the ridicule and exhuberant as a form of humor.
And the prospect of intercourse is simply a driving force for every endeavor I partake.
I'm glad you appreciate the effort :D

Submitted(+1)

This mechanic feels great for dialogue choices! I haven't played Reigns so this is my first encounter with it, but I think you made it work really well. Pulling side to side and often seeing really different options reminded me a bit of...I think it was Dragon Age 2 where highlighting options on the dialogue wheel before choosing would make your character make faces that went along with the tone, and it was really enjoyable. It sounds like I might be the only one who actually liked that the swipe directions of choices were randomized, but for me it mixed it up and kept it from falling into the over-simple trap some similar systems do of "left choice good, right choice bad" but based on the way the choices actually work and how silly and varied they are this probably wouldn't be a game that had that problem if they were consistent. I loved the tone and even though it was a bit short that meant I never hesitated to make a ridiculous choice that I knew would end badly, because it would be so quick to try again (and sometime the ridiculous choice didn't end badly, which was HILARIOUS and rewarding).

Personally I don't feel like this is a failed experiment at all, but a really successful one. It might have failed to be everything you envisioned, but that's always a tall order during a jam, and I think you showed a ton of potential with what you managed! And from my experience, any time you can submit something playable by jam deadline is an absolute win. You should feel good about it!

Developer

Wow, thanks!

I did seem overly critical with the game.

With the feedback I've got so far it seems like it was enjoyable if a little quirky.

My extreme bad reaction was that, most of the time spend was into things that didnt featured, because the time didnt allowed me to make the type of narrative I wanted.

But I also have grown fond of this short narrative.

I will, shortly after voting ends push a longer experience.

Submitted(+1)

Neat! Unfinished as it is, this is a good format for storytelling and it's got the right mix of horny and funny. And there actually is a decent amount of content in it!

Developer

Thanks!
I have been working more and it's a very funny way to write.
Since this format is constrained to have an evolving conversation between two forces, the one who talks for the player and the one who talks for the game.

Submitted(+1)

the card mechanic is very cool.

i like both the humor and the horny in the writing.

i feel like some of the failure states don't really make sense. one of them just said something like "you were doing so good" and i really had no idea what was supposed to be wrong with the choice i had picked. i almost wonder if more explanation of some failure states would make sense. (especially if it was diagetic... e.g. see what the dragon's reaction is and then they send us to our grave/back to the beginning/whatever)

Developer

Thanks, The truth is I had little to no time to revise the cards content.
I am flattered that you found any of it enjoyable :D
The final version will have longer endings and more memorable scenes so you get something even on a failstate.

Submitted(+1)

I really like the format.  It's great.  And it's funny!!! Good job.

Developer(+1)

Thank! 

The comedy is there to hide my panic xD

I believe it worked...

Submitted(+1)

Interested to see where this goes, I know you mentioned not having an ending, but down the line if you decide to come back to this, perhaps some of the wrong routes could lead to their own choices and unique comedic failings.

What that tongue do though~

Developer(+1)

I'm glad you enjoyed it.

My reasoning with what little I had was, that every choise should mean something.

So, the "game over" card didnt fit that criteria.

In the second half of the story I realiced their effectiveness for comedy, character building and worldbuilding.

That's why there are two unique bad ending cards.

Making 4 total possible ways to end the game.


That tongue do magic too powerfull to cast in time for the jam end date...

Submitted(+1)

Enjoyed the comedy aspect of this game, would like to see this expanded, but not a fan of the choices swapping sides. Would either like choices to stay static, or visible before swiping. Both at once feels like im being punished for trying to explore paths and trying again.

Developer

Thanks for playing.

Yeah, the swapping is removed from the current versión i'm working with.

I was hoping that it would fly by since the jam version is so short xD

Submitted(+1)

Okay as soon as I saw "LET ME HAVE THAT PLUMP PUSSY" I just knew, this is one of those games where I'm going to pick every wrong dialog option on purpose because I just can't resist, isn't it?

So, sure, this is just a rough prototype, but I actually love the concept (honestly there need to be more Reigns-likes) and the writing here seriously had me laughing the whole time. Would really love to see you continue this!

Developer

Thanks!!

I'm surprised in a good way for how this game has been taken.

It's very different from what I'm used to do, and since all fell apart until the last day, so I was very insecure about this.

Your comment is really appreciated.

(+1)

A "Reigns but sexy" game sounds really fun, and I like what you have so far, little and rough as it might be! Some visual flair would really kick this up a notch, you have a solid foundation with this :) 

Developer

Thanks!

I would love feedback on the visuals if you had something in mind n.n

Submitted (1 edit) (+1)

As rough prototypes go, this has a lot of potential. I'm a suck for novel story presentation for IF shaped things. I am unfortunately easily bored by box-of-text-in-the-same-place. However, these cards allow for a decent bit of text that never feels too long nor to short. I also don't think I've seen a Reign style game for an erotic game. I think this little engine could be the basis of a bunch of narratives.

One piece of feedback I have is maybe having a setup like:

That way the choices stay readable and don't have to fade-in and out. Aside from that, I hope you manage to put this engine of yours to work in future projects. Looks like it'd be fun to work with.

Developer

Thanks for the feedback and the kind words!
I would like to know if the fading was bothersome, or why you felt it needed to go.

-Ramblings of a mad man ahead-
To engage in dialog regarding the design proposition you made I feel there is a tradeof if we were to display the option instead of fading it in.
The fade in allows the reveal of the option after the player finished reading the prompt. Lowering the noise (I am very suceptible to noise in the designs so I minimize it as much as possible when I can).  And having to handle the card in the screen for making desitions has a ludic aspect to the desition that I really like.

Submitted(+1)

Hm, I did like the fade-in. Perhaps all that is actually missing a little intro sequence to draw attention to it. I totally missed it the first time through.

Developer(+1)

I was just adding a line with "<--     -->" in the bottom of the first card.
Since the "didn't know what to do" seem like a recurrin issue.
On the final game an animation will move it a little from side to side in the very fist card.

Submitted(+1)

I like this setup! Choices feel punchy and dynamic. I don't know if you plan on adding art or keeping it strictly text-focused, but it could be neat to see little illustrations or emoji fade in that accompany the text option. The dialogue is fun and very to the point. I hope you'll develop it further, I definitely see potential for a memorable text-based adventure system!

Developer(+1)

Yea! I would love to add art, in some form or another (the only guarantee is the background and card design).
But the main objective is to learn and construct non-linear stories.
So the art is taking more of a backseat this time.
But having drawings, icons, fonts, sounds, and those, are in mind for printing personality on each encounter. 

Submitted(+1)

Similar to Cloudbird, I also feel like I'm only seeing the tip of the iceberg here. I like the card-based system for presenting story and decisions, that's really clever. With a bit more visual input I think this could be really interesting. I know the narrative right now is a pretty tropey knight v dragon, but with the card mechanic being so... skewmorphic, I almost wonder if it would be super cohesive in a story about like strip poker or something? I could see this being super effective further down the line. Alternatively if your decisions on left or right could actually compile into a visual stack on screen, it might be a fun way to communicate some kind of morality system? Lots of potential with this mechanic I feel.

Developer(+1)

Yea, this is just the start. But I'll most likely see how far I cant take this mechanic before shaking things up.
My objective was to  made a system that helps me write non-linear stories and understand them in a deeper way, so that would be the first priority moving forward.
But having the choiices stack on the left or right and be used as stats or resources is extremely interesting tho...

Submitted(+1)

I liked Reigns and I like this. I liked where this was going. I feel like I only saw the tip of the iceberg of content here but the concept is solid. Neat!

Developer

Thanks!
It motivates me that you think that.
I'll try my best when moving forward :D

Submitted(+1)

Yay Reigns-like porn game! The writing was silly in the best way, I wanted to know more about the time loop and the world while still finding the scene hot (and stupid in the best way). Would definitely enjoy more, esp with the ability to mark or previously explored routes.

Developer(+1)

Thanks!!
I had thought about that featue, but with the non-linearity expected of the product it was hard to implement.
The engine is non-linear yet by limitation of time I had to put a mostly linear story in place, some quirks come from that fact.
I could make a action planning mapper for detecting reached, non reached endings, and those not reached by the algorithm could be marked as completed. That would create a loading screen tho, if the amount of cards grow a lot.

Thanks for the comment, it made me thought a feasible solution :D!

Submitted(+1)

Looking forward to it!

Submitted(+1)

The method of swiping left and right for dialogue option was pretty neat, and the dialogue itself was fun. It would be nice to see this concept expanded upon.

Developer(+1)

Thanks. I got a chaotic jam (to say it shortly).
Every kind word motivates me to continue with it and polish it.
So I feel gratefull.

Submitted(+1)

Really interesting core mechanic! The narrative options are very silly but enjoyable, very fun proof of concept!

As someone else wrote, I agree that the swapping dialog options every play through makes it hard to figure out what I have and haven't tried yet.

I would love to see more added as there is definitely something fun with what you have here!

Developer (1 edit)

Thanks! Yeah, I felt the swapping was annoying, hearing the feedback was confirmation.
Yet, the system was meant for you to have multiple options for each path that would unlock by certain requirements.
That is implemented, but I could't create that branching content in time. And the randomization only made things worst.

Submitted(+1)

A really funny story, I love how forward the knight is with his desires. Idk why but the whole swiping left and right thing gave me some cool ideas about a phone-based game. Maybe that was your intent? Anyway, it's hard sometimes when your work doesn't go according to plan, so I understand if you faced some hurdles during development, but you should definitely expand on that idea more in the future, I think you got something here.

Developer

Thanks! The mechanic was inspired by reigns.

Its an interesting way to tell a story and being handheld, one hand compatible makes it even better.

And thanks for liking it, I want to do more with it! n.n

Submitted(+1)

Getting hit with “LET ME HAVE THAT PLUMP PUSSY” while trying to figure out the controls was a hysterical double take moment.

What’s here is a cute play through! I wish the paths didn’t randomly assign to the sides on each go around - it makes it a bit hard to mentally map out what I have and haven’t tried. There’s some fun moments, and it’s fun to see the concept taken as humorously as it is. While it is very bare-bones, it’s certainly functional to a point that saying its a ‘failure’ seems unnecessarily harsh. Hopefully though this game inspires your next one to be even better!

Developer (1 edit) (+1)

Thanks a lot for the kind feedback :D

I had a lot of expectations that end up unfulfiled.

So the kindness is well appreciated n.n