"Incomprehensible, may god have mercy on your wretched soul"
Actually I kinda liked it for some reason.
I think I mostly figured it out. You need to click the red thingy when the traffic light is yellow or red (red gives more points), i think you lose hp if you let it stay red for too long. Screen behind you breaks sometimes and you can click to fix it (i think it sometimes followed by a sound cue, but maybe sound cue is for when you lose hp due to unfixed screen, or maybe you don't lose hp from it at all, idk). Not sure if there's a reason to complete the minigame on the ipad, but sometimes eagles would hit your minigame guy, taking your real hp. They have a consistent sound cue, but it's barely possible to react by sound alone. I think you can time them by the traffic light too, they seem to have similar time periods, but maybe not. I found that in minigame if you position yourself right above the river, eagles almost always miss you, but maybe it was just luck, idk. I got 37 points at my best attempt.
Would be nice to have some keyboard controls