Fresh page with no demo yet usually dies on “what am I actually playing in 3 seconds.”
I’d pressure-test:
1) Cover + title line — must read as the fantasy loop (build deck → run → die → unlock), not mood art alone.
2) First 3 screenshots — one board state mid-run, one reward/upgrade choice, one death/run-summary. Skip logo dumps.
3) Short description — verb-first (“Roguelike deckbuilder where you…”) before lore.
Happy to mark the top 3 risks on the live page in plain English if useful — no redesign pitch.