The collage style is lovely, and help to set the tone in many ways. Writing style is also clearly focused. In my taste it's a little too dreamy and and unharmfull, and i didn't love the map (art is good but layout is too predictable). But everything is delivered in such a strong, focused voice, it is lovable anyway
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Outstanding work! Match the blend of Ocarina. ItO, and creepy mystery perfectly. As others have noted, the map is brilliant and makes me want to give that a go. A few other minor points:
- madness specter: the art and description were spot on for this. What came first for you? If the art is from public domain I’d love to know more of that story.
- font: Thematically it had almost a dreamy feel to the font, which I liked. But the typeface was a little challenging for me to read in color. It was a bit better in bw. Might be a me problem?
- while impossible to apply to every campaign, perhaps in an extended edition offer a rollable table or two for why characters would enter that you can explicitly tie into the module? I could see some tables struggling to do so without a bit more prompting.
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Storm Ring of ThalabaThank you so much!
I didn't think I would get all these positive comments and feedback and now I feel like I really should expand the module in the future. The idea of adding more tables definitely will be the first I'll do, thanks for the suggestion! As for the font I think I get what you mean, maybe as it is a kinda thin font that makes it harder to read. I actually chose intentionally the thinner version of that font because that's the aesthetic I like but I'll try to use the light or regular one instead of the thin one and see how it looks.
I really like the Madness specter story, thanks for giving me the chance to tell it, haha. I did get most visual material from the public domain, mainly the NYPL Digital Collection and The Public Domain Review. I never really used those sites before but saw them suggested at the jam main page and gave it a try. I needed material for a creature so I looked up "Animals" and found this collection which wast great for me because the pics have a good quality, most animals are in front of a clear background to help me use them more easily and that vintage illustration style really fits the vibe. I was halfway done with the collage when I realized "Oh! All these animals are extinct. That's convenient" and that tied it even better to the death theme. I even considered to add a suggestion (before I ran out of space) to describe the specter as an amalgamation of any extinct animals you like, even made up ones that fit the setting you are running, and the illustration being more as inspo. Kind of like how different variations of "Alebrijes" are in mexican culture.
The process of photobashing the pics was really easy actually, they all kinda blended together like magic, I think mostly because all of them are illustrated with the same flat perspective. I'm really proud of how it came out and people seem to like it so lemme add the picture to the downloads in case anyone wants to use it for something.
Love the overall design. Also, your writing style is quite nice. I enjoyed reading this. Breaking the fourth wall made me smile, too. Good stuff!
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THE CROOKED TAVERNLove the collage style. Also great that there's an English and a Spanish version.
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Sorrows of the Seventh SonThe visual design is brilliant, and the paperwork done for the map-cover is really cool. I can see this be played in any kind of game but oneshots, as there is some work needed by GMs to adapt it to the group. Great job nonetheless.
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Orobus OrdainsThe visual design is brilliant, and the paperwork done for the map-cover is really cool. I can see this be played in any kind of game but oneshots, as there is some work needed by GMs to adapt it to the group. Great job nonetheless.
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Orobus OrdainsI love it! The papercraft works great and the labyrinth looks fun. It seems to be a bit heavy on the DM, though. Lots of things very specific for the characters to come up with. Might be difficult in a oneshot, but could be a great catharsis for a campaign near the end as part of a preparation for the final battle!
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The Prison of the Star SovereignThe paper craft style map on the cover is very cool, with really nice art throughout. All felt very ethereal in nature which was cool. I liked the idea of the shadow copy encounter, could be a fun role-play scene! Great submission! 🌙
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Challenge of ChampionsVisually very nice! The writing is really good despite being translated.
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Thrice-Bound in the Sigil VaultThe visual design here is particularly strong. The writing is good. I assume it was originally written in Spanish then translated to English, so there are a few clunky parts. I'm not knocking off any points for that though because I barely got my submission written in one language, let alone two.
I think the navigation puzzle is particularly useable. If I were to run this, I'd probably beef up the encounters though. I would also ask my players for a handful of facts about their characters that those characters wouldn't want to admit, to help set up the Madness Specter encounter.
I do think there's the potential to feel unrewarded at the end of the adventure. It does sort of have the, "it was all a dream" trope baked in. I'd recommend including a line to the GM to reward the characters something appropriate to the system they're playing. It doesn't have to be treasure, in fact I think it probably cheapens the experience a little bit if it is. But I could see a substantial experience reward, a long lost memento from their past, or an opportunity to permanently change something about the character to make the experience feel like it was truly worthwhile for the players to go through.
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In The Talon's of StolasThanks so much for the feedback!
Fun fact, I actually wrote it first in english and then I wrote the spanish version because I didn't want to let spanish-speaking folks excluded. But as english isn't my first language, I see how language flaws will be noticeable, but I'm sure it'll get better over time.
As for the feedback about the mechanics of the game, I have to say I'm still fairly new to TTRPGs and this is the first module I've ever written. I mention it not as an excuse, but to express I really appreciate your comments. I do see now all the things you pointed and I will keep them in mind to improve future works and maybe publish a 2.0 version of this one!
This whole aesthetic is so cute!!! Whole adventure is solid, I love the writing and the brilliant layout. Superb work!
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The Violet Flame Ascendingthe visuals on this one are absolutely stunning! excellent work :]
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Battle in the Mind's Eye
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