Post by CosmicCadet in Queen of the Zhar - A FatherFog Twoshot jam comments

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This is a fun idea. I like the lottery setup idea and Act Three is a great goal/climax!

I am struggling with the discordant layout design between the interior and exterior. Was there a reason to make them completely different?
The map is beautiful art, but I think the locations need to stand out more. I mistook the river for the path. The cave and the left/right choice is are not reflected there. Could you add the fogline as an unobtrusive path maker?
The motivations are a little confusing. If the pilgrimage happens once a generation, how does a youth have a sibling who was in a previous one? Or go on a second one?
Is the Sisterhood for women only? It would be interesting to make this adventure for women-only characters!
I could use some stats or behaviour guide for the Sisters once the group starts messing with the ritual. Is it possible to escape?
What happens if the Queen is not revived?

The monochrome to color transition is an artistic expression of the dark of the fog and the light of fires. Since it's the outside of the trifold it acts as a cover and the two schemes are unified rather than appearing together. The color interior reflects the slavic traditional art of the tale
The map is where most of the release edits are being done and we agree! As it stands we're going for a dotted line and icons
A "generation" is just cohorts of kids when it comes down to it but by a general definition, having much older siblings isn't uncommon but I know it of people I grew up with. "Youths" is also vague. Young adults didn't seem to roll of the tongue so much.
It came up that we could call this out but I wonder about being exclusive! The other fruitful void here for Guides, I think, is to devise how they feel about Chosen vs Volunteers.
I'm thinking about this too although were it MoSh I'd be pointed to Unconfirmed Contact Reports or a "Standard Human" which we can't fall back on as easily for FF0E. Probably still doable.
She remains trapped in her Egg and the fallout of all those concerned is left to question!