Thank you so much for the notes! I agree with your points, especially regarding structure and developing the ideas further. Ironically, I dashed out what's functionally a sketch in a quick session because I'm buried under orchestration homework for school. (I'm in a part-time orchestration/composition MFA. /o\ ) I'm hoping that when schoolwork calms down I can revisit this with your comments in mind. I really appreciate the time you took to give such detailed feedback and suggestions, and thank you for your work and generosity hosting this music jam!