Your solution would not work the way you think it would work. And it is highly questionable. This "refund, but only if our staff was in the mood and it did not rain the day before" is problematic. The criteria are too vague and you cannot define them in a way that will not also remove 90% of current Itch games.
proper execution, absence of malware, adequate descriptions, and basic effort
What does proper mean. What does execution mean. Excluding malware is nonsensical, as it is of course forbidden. Mentioning it, does not improve the idea. What does adequate mean? And the most important bit: basic effort. What does that mean? A feature a pro does in 1 minute an amateur might need 3 days for. Who put more "effort" into it? The 3 day attempt of the amateur might still look like slop in comparison to the hand waved half attempt of the pro. You cannot quantify "effort" in a trivial way. It will be arbitrary. And you cannot bet money on arbitrary criteria.
And yes, the games that ai agent account publishes will fulfill all of your vague and formal criteria. It is not malware. It is proper games and it will have "basic" effort, evident by the well phrased description and the fact that it is a playable game and not a bricked exe. And that ai agent account is not a criminal account. It's just slop because of mass production and overusage of ai. But it is not malicious. You could remove that account by simply telling the account holder that such activity is not wanted on Itch. The account holder either complies or turns to malicious tactics - which then should be fought with the systems that fight all the criminals trying to abuse Itch.
Banning and curbing malicious accounts is all good and well, and I have seen a huge amount of those . But your topic and your proposal is not about them. It is about a quality standard. You want games to pass a greenlighting test. Something that reminds me of Steam. Steam is geared towards professional publishes. Itch is not. Itch is geared towards self publishing developers and includes inept and beginner devs, that will release low quality games - if you compare those games to professional games.
You think that all is ok, because, yeah, they can still upload, and they are only not indexed on Itch. But ... why? There is aleady a store for professional games. Several, actually. And even on Itch you can always go look at /games/store . There is still a bit of slop there, but the section of paid only games only has 50k games and not 1.500k games.
So in short, your proposal might achieve locking out "low effort posters" and some criminals (who, btw, would just pay with fake credit card or publish on hacked accounts and collect their payload in the time it takes to notice the fraud. Bolstered by the seal of approval of Itch staff. I have seen that happen a lot. They used hacked accounts with exisiting credentials and even released paid games. They try everything.)
... but the result would not be Itch anymore, it would be a less popular Steam, with less features.
A more prudent suggestion would be a new default section of browse that would combine
/games/new-and-popular/featured and /games/newest/fresh
Browse a constantly updating set of projects sourced from curated collections by our members. Check back for new additions.
I have no clue what that means, but I sure hope those curators do not put slop in there.
And yeah, your whole suggestion is about weeding out recent. The problems you describe are not existent on the other browse pages or the homepage.
Do not get me wrong, I think demanding some kind of minimum standard for publishing projects is a good thing. And imposing a publishing limit would be even more prudent. The (non criminal) slop posters are easily detectable. I just do not think your solution is doable at all, or in way that Itch is still Itch.