itch.io

Super cute and fun concept, and amazing aesthetics/interface too (I was impressed this was made with Twine)! Well done!!

I'm so happy you think so!!

That's so sweet, thank you!!

I'm so happy to hear that, thanks so much for the lovely comment!!

Hi and welcome!

I'm not sure how much use this forum will see, but I wanted to create it just in case it could be of use to anyone interested in writing, implementing or editing flavourful game responses.

After putting together a NarraScope talk on the topic, I still have lots more notes, excerpts and resources I plan to share, once I figure out the best format and organization for them (e.g. mini-guides for customizing responses in certain systems, or possible "best practices" in designing them).

Don't hesitate to reply to this thread or start a new one if there's anything response-related you'd like to talk about! I'm fully open to any questions, and I'd love to maintain this page over the long term as a sort of community resource to assemble knowledge from different people and corners of the web all in one place.

Bon appétit!

Congrats on Best In Show, it was well-deserved for such a cool project!!

I'm so glad the feedback could be helpful! 

I feel like I missed some details in my last comment, so just clarifying in case it can also help:

- I also enjoy the kick-to-chat idea, it's just the uncertainty about which enemies are chat-able that made me hesitate! It seems like the overall rule might be "enemies that don't chase you are safe to kick"? But there are a few times I avoided kicking a character because I was afraid it might trigger a huge fight if I guessed wrong, and I was discouraged from experimenting because dying on longer floors can feel so punishing (though of course that last part could change depending on adjustments to difficulty or to the save system, etc.!)

- Regarding the minimap, I was imagining something simple that fills up as we explore, but may not necessarily give all the info (for example, not revealing hidden rooms until they're entered). "Minimap" may be the wrong term actually, I guess I meant a simplified and scaled-down dynamic map? But I like your ideas and suggestions, too!
Honestly most floors felt good to me with their natural shapes and scenery markers, and I didn't feel a strong need for a map while playing those. It was mostly just the spooky floor that made me wish for some way to more efficiently track where I've been, since it requires a lot more back-and-forth while combing every room for the right scenery.

And I definitely understand about running out of time, haha...

I've bookmarked the game and I'm really looking forward to later releases, all your plans sound super cool!! (Especially very excited about the SugarCube writeup, it's such a fascinating accomplishment!)

Oh please do! 💀 And thanks for the kind words, that really means a lot!!
I was actually thinking just the same about your entry—I was excited about all the possibilities for cutting up the art and re-assembling it into different things, so it was super cool to see so much of that in your game! I was especially impressed by all the doorways and the more complex asset mashups (also LOL, I just noticed the "spurs" on Tallface Tim, that's great!)

The kazoo scale is pretty sloppy but it's seemed surprisingly useable so far, I'd definitely love to hear if you end up making something with it!! (I'm also thinking of eventually packaging up a more complete selection of notes and sounds, maybe for Volume 2)

I have to admit I really didn't know what to make of this entry, but I do appreciate its unique format and humour (and actually surprisingly good use of crayon assets in the slideshow)!

Thank you! 💀💖(And I would definitely recommend it!) 
I love the ink language in general but I was nervous about figuring out how to plug it into a graphical game—this has been a really great way to experiment with that and learn a little more about how it all works!

Thanks so much for your comment, I'm glad you enjoyed the skellifications! 💀🎉

What an impressive and highly-polished entry! I'm also stunned that this was made in Twine, and I'd really love to read more about your modifications at some point!!

Some of my favourite bits:

- Great controls and settings (including volume sliders and customizeable key bindings!), with some nicely enjoyable dungeon-crawling.

- Being able to retry from the start of a floor was nice!

- Very effective and creative use of a wide variety of graphical/audio assets, including tons of really fantastic edits!

- Lots of fun little things to discover! "For a few floors more", the passguns, the signs, all the quirky creatures and characters... I loved seeing all the different floor themes.

Two things I remember having a bit of trouble with were speaking to characters (I wasn't sure when a kick would count as talking or attacking, and I almost missed the subtle links inside dialogue text), and navigation in the bigger levels (a minimap would be so cool to see, if that's something you'd ever consider adding in!)

Also, I have to admit the ending  bummed me out! I appreciated the twist (and the bits of worldbuilding scattered throughout the dungeon in general), but I would have liked to have a bit more agency in how the story plays out and/or for the story and gameplay to tie together maybe a little more clearly?

But I'd definitely love to play more of the game in the future, especially with the features you mentioned wanting to add! This is great stuff and super cool to see!

Hurray!

- Very amusing and original premise! I like how it actually integrates both the crayons and the kazoo directly into the story. It felt like just the right length for a fun little adventure (though definitely on the difficult side). Phyllis was an interesting anti-hero!

- The 2D/3D mix is lovely and gives me a similar feel as the classic Paper Mario games! The sprite animations are great too (I especially loved the adorable swimming fish), and there's nice use of sound.

- Though there's obviously a lot of original art that's not from the PC&K pack, it looks very good and meshes really well with the jam assets (which are used in creative ways)!

I think my only wish, if the game gets more development, would be for a few quality-of-life features like a checkpoint system or a way to advance text without skipping it entirely (maybe also different responses to attempting certain interactions in the wrong order)?

Fantastic work on this overall, it feels very high-quality!

Great job on the GB conversions, it's cool how the crayon-ness still comes across pretty well! (I also love your how-to guide on how the process works!!)

The "no arm" version is such a subtle thing but a super good idea!

I've already said it elsewhere but I love your cactus-cowboy edit hahaha 🌵💚 (it works shockingly well!!)

Phenomenal work on all of your edits!! 👏👏👏 They really look great (plus are super thematic and/or amusing)!

Oh, and "Allyson Gray" would be perfect for credit (thank you)!!

I absolutely love everything that's been shared so far!!! 💖

I've just compiled what I have into a folder on my own game's page:

I added outlines back in for the sprites where I'd removed them—I'll swap those out in-game after the jam is over, since I feel like the outlines look better after all (at least on the backgrounds I'm using)! But I'm keeping both versions in the pack, just in case the no-outline ones could be of use to someone.

I also included a very rough kazoo music scale, and the new version of Danz Makaz* I managed to build with it. They still use pitch adjustment, but less than the current in-game version, which I hope helps preserve the kazoo-y sound!

* (a kazoo rendition of the skeleton-themed classical tune Danse macabre)

I loved your dead snake edit—it was perfect!! I didn't actually realize it wasn't an official sprite until I read your post!

This was the first entry I checked out, still in the middle of the submission period, and it set the perfect tone for the jam!

- The overall story is fun, with some nice humour and a few interesting little twists!

- I love that you made strong use of the cactus sprite (even giving it some cool gear!), and featured my all-time favourite voice clip CACTUS??!

- All the sound effects and pictures come together well to complement the text—I really liked how there are so many animations instead of just static images! I think the sunset scene at the end might be my favourite, but all of them were great.

I was generally too scared to stay out of cover, so my fights were interminable... but still enjoyable! It was a bit of a shame to see Cactus be consumed by vengefulness, but at least now it can move on and find a better partner.🤠🌵

Thanks so much for the kind words, and for your fantastic assets that made it all possible!! 👏💀 They really sparked inspiration and were so much fun to play around with!

For the music, I'd started out by clipping individual notes from the asset songs to try and assemble a full naturally-occurring scale, but I ended up having to do some very clumsy pitch adjustment instead—which sadly made the kazoo sound much less kazoo-y! I'm so glad it still sounded okay (and I'd love to revisit the concept once I'm a little less clueless about sound editing).

Thank you for playing, I'm so happy you enjoyed the story!
In case you're not familiar with the tune, it's from Danse Macabre, one of the best pieces of spooky classical music (which was based on a poem where Death brings skeletons out of their graves at midnight to frolic until morning)! 💀🎶

Oh, thank you, that's so sweet!! I'm so relieved it could get sorted out in the end (and super thankful for Damon's help)!
This jam has been even more fun than I expected, I'm absolutely loving all the fun and creative entries!

And I'm incredibly happy to hear you liked the story!! I was actually a little nervous about the narrator's voice, so it's really wonderful to hear that it hit the mark after all, and that the heartwarming feelings came across like I hoped. Thanks so much again! 💀💖

Thanks so much for the kind words, that really means a lot! I'm so glad you enjoyed it! 💀🎉
If you ever decide to make something with ink, I'd love to see it! It's definitely nice for keeping track of choice points, branching stories, etc., and seems very flexible overall (either with custom interfaces like the one I used, or to plug into existing game engines).

That's so lovely to hear! Thank you for playing! 💀❤

Definitely the most upbeat (and lucrative) fight to the death I've ever experienced!!

- The species input and how it was used was a fun surprise!

- The assets seemed perfectly chosen for a smaller game scope—I thought the wall & floor background, the textboxes, and the close-up focus on the two animals all came together really well (along with the off-screen audience and other SFX!)

- I love how you used some of Adversus's great edits (the rat's sprite change gave me a good laugh!)

- The Yosemite Convention(!!)

- I enjoyed getting to pick "No" repeatedly (I would have loved to see more different responses to it, but it was already fun as-is!)

- An interesting little twist, too!

Well done putting it all together in a super short time!

No, this is great and exactly what I was hoping to see!! Thank you for sharing your thoughts! 

Responding with a few (possibly longer!) thoughts of my own:

The neurodivergent angle is super interesting, and not one I had considered could be important even though I'm also part of that group myself! I feel like your explanation makes a lot of sense and is very plausible, though personally I find the "non-neurodivergent" angle equally plausible (explanation below).
But I'll revisit the story when I have a chance with that interpretation in mind, I wonder if I'll pick up on something new this time!

I also hadn't considered some of those options for the ending, they seem plausible too! I did get the impression that the end was left intentionally vague, and I thought it was very well-done overall. It felt fairly optimistic to me, especially with the little afterword that follows!

I will say that I've tried to visit every page in the story over a few playthroughs, but it's possible I missed an option somewhere or glossed over an important detail in the text, which could affect my interpretations!

That being said, it seemed to me like the kid may not even have done anything intense or out of the ordinary to trigger the "punishments".
Like you, I definitely saw the mother as abusive, and I also feel like she's probably not fully aware of the damage she's doing. But the impression I got was that she's not purely misguided—I think she has some deeper issues of her own (e.g. trouble controlling her emotions or communicating in a healthy way).

These things really stood out to me:
- Her face suddenly shuttering during what seemed like an innocent moment to the kid
- Seemingly not explaining at all what the transgression was
- Possibly getting carried away by her anger (grabbing the arm very hard, slamming down the hourglass)
- Punishing the kid for needing a bathroom break

It is possible that the kid is misremembering the events and there actually was something like a meltdown or big "misbehaviour" followed by an explanation, though! That just wasn't my initial reading. The mom came across to me as being quick to anger and emotionally closed-off, and the kid's self-doubt and anxiety felt like it was strongly fueled by that. 

Thinking about it some more, I do think it could easily be both things at once—the kid "misbehaving" in ways that make the mother's personal issues even worse! One thing I like about focusing more specifically on the mother's behaviour is the message that if a parent has certain kinds of unhealed issues, it may not even matter how "well-behaved" a kid is, because even completely normal and innocent things can set off an explosion. But I do also love the focus on what the kid can do or has control over in that situation, and the whole "freedom" angle you discuss (plus thinking about the possible misunderstandings from both of their brains working so differently)!

Sorry that was a little disorganized, hopefully it still made sense... you gave me a lot of interesting points to think about!

Thanks for sharing these! I hadn't heard of a Dopefish before, it's fun to learn where it came from.
I'm also intrigued by the secrets I haven't seen yet!

Looks great! 👍
And thank you for sharing the story! I really enjoyed the evocative and impactful writing, as well as the themes explored and the characterization throughout!

I hadn't thought about the "art" element within both stories adding to the thematic choice of assets, that's a really interesting perspective!

(As an aside, one thing I especially enjoyed was the descriptions of how the princess decorated her veil!)

That would be really cool, it's already such an addictive little game! Playing a few more rounds, I'm also noticing lots of great details I hadn't paid much attention to before (like the wobble when characters move or the squishing effect when slimes are picked up)!

Oh, I love those ideas! I'd definitely be curious to play an expanded version if you do make one!

What an interesting and unique entry!

- The minimalistic use of the jam assets worked well to separate the two stories (and were also well-chosen and well-used for atmosphere/immersion)!

- Very effective and insightful writing with great emotional impact.

- I really liked the realistic story and I also really liked the fairytale (though there are a couple of things I didn't fully understand about the latter)! I was happy with my initial playthrough, but also enjoyed replaying to see other variations.

But I admit that I couldn't figure out how the two stories might relate to each other, or what realization the protagonist might have had at the end! I'll be curious to hear how other readers interpreted the story, and maybe eventually read anything the author may want to share (but no pressure of course)!

Hi, I think I found a page that has a bit too much text for one screen—scrollbars might need to be enabled in the itch settings so we can scroll down to the links! (Though in the meantime, I was able to proceed by zooming out in my browser!) 

Just as advertised—quick and simple fun! It took me a moment to understand how to get past the tutorial, but from there I really enjoyed myself!

Some of my favourite bits:

- The use of sound effects was especially great! 

- Unique and intriguing premise!

- Warning for slime violence and rat explosions (very important!!)

- The boss!!! That was such a perfect moment and brilliantly executed!

The leaderboard is a nice touch, too! I'll probably be coming back to try to top my score...

That was nerve-wracking but fun!
I had no idea what my goal was until I got there, but from what I recall that's pretty accurate for some of those older games hahaha (I bet the manual would be filled with exciting lore!)

- The breathing mechanic is neat, it almost feels like a little rhythm game. The hacking segment was a nice surprise too! 

- I had a few small issues with the controls, but it seemed nice and smooth overall! 

- The GameBoy-ified crayon art was super interesting to see, and I love the fake GB box for the cover image!

- I really enjoyed trying the minigames and poking around the various menus (including the option to crash the game...)

Nice work!!

I love that it's called the "swimulator"!