itch.io

Other than a few typos and some images not found in the game, it was a good visual novel. I liked all the routes, but it's disappointing that even in the escape route, the protagonist never truly escapes. I had to press ignore when the errors popped up on the screen. This is one of them:

Otherwise, I changed the text in accessibility to make the size of the text bigger and to change the font to a more readable one, at least for me, anyway. Furthermore, the coloring of the text blends in with the backgrounds of the game menu and main menu and can become unreadable in certain places in those menu screens. Additionally, you can hide the quick menu with $ quick_menu = False. That way, it goes away, since you have buttons meant for those actions instead. Just a tip and a suggestion there. Regardless of the minor nitpicks, I liked the cute art style, the cohesion of the candy artwork throughout, and the bittersweet endings. Keep up the good work!

Hey, thanks for the various tracks you provided! I was able to use Endless Snow and Daydreaming in my latest visual novel! They definitely helped set the appropriate tone and mood for such scenes without those moments becoming overly serious or too lighthearted. Thanks! I also credited you as always as well. You can check it out here if it interests you:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/my-sunshine.

Hey, thanks for these awe-inspiring and beautiful musical tracks! They really helped set the tone for some of the more serious and tender scenes of my latest visual novel! I credited you as well alongside mentioning what pieces I used. You can check it out here if it piques your interest:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/my-sunshine.

Hey, thanks for the chirpy and upbeat music once again! I used Take It Easy in my latest visual novel to help fit the lighthearted tone of it. I credited you as well. You can check it out here if you're interested:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/my-sunshine.

Hey, thanks for the GUI template once again! I used it in my latest visual novel and credited you as well as mentioning any and all edits I made to it. Check it out here if it piques your interest:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/my-sunshine.

Hey, I made another visual novel with a bunch of your backgrounds in my latest one. Thanks for the amazing work once again! Check it out if you're interested:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/my-sunshine.

I finally got all of the endings and had to go through the guide to get the last ending I couldn't find for the life of me. I feel dumb now because in hindsight, I was going to see what would happen if Seth had the secret, but I totally forgot about that and figured his other ending was a bad ending, not another good ending. 

Furthermore, speaking of Seth's path, I did notice that the background remained as the one with the lake in it while they were walking home in the story. I think in that case, a black screen would have sufficed and would have been less jarring. 

Otherwise, I did notice a typo where Alden should have said "couple" but instead said "bouple."

Regardless, I enjoyed the experience, and thank you for the guide!

This was a great otome game with a lot of variety. I really liked learning about Devlin and going through his route, but his ending was anticlimactic. Same with Alden's. His route pleasantly surprised me, but him confessing his love for MC felt a bit much than if he would have just said that he liked her, but maybe that's just me. 

Additionally, the ending felt a bit anticlimactic and odd with the drinking reference and the ending title of that route. I think both endings seemed to have ended too abruptly after the mutual confession, whereas with Seth's good ending, there was a little nice get-together with him, MC, and Cherri, making the ending feel more like a natural ending and a satisfying one, too. Seth was best boy! Although, Seth's kissing CG was cropped and small, and I was also hoping to have seen other CGs of the main character kissing the other two love interests. Oh, well!

Although, the first ending I got, which was Seth's bad ending in ending 7, I thought there was going to be a mini epilogue after MC's fallout with Seth, but there wasn't. So, when that route ended right after that argument, the conclusion came to me by surprise because I was expecting something else to tie up the final threads of the story. I felt like that ending and some other routes ended at the climax, and a falling action or resolution was skipped. 

Otherwise, I surprisingly enjoyed everybody's routes. I was confused and disappointed when I didn't see Iris take Seth out for lunch or didn't see Devlin show Iris more of his poems. I felt like those were missing scenes, unless I just so happened to have missed those scenes. 

I also think the story could have been more immersive if Iris had her own character sprite, even as a side portrait beside the textbox, since the protagonist didn't really feel like a self-insert. I also wasn't a fan of her constantly gushing and obsessing over Alden, but I'm glad she still had a personality outside of Alden and that her personality was shown in other ways with her friends and love interests.

Regardless, I liked the music, the character designs, their various facial expressions, and the U.I. and menus and everything. Good job!

This visual novel had me cracking up with all of its one-liners! Warren is the best character in the game, and the chibi sprites were super cute, too, and added to the comedy of the game. I got the Not M ending, which was super sweet and cute. It was such a good ending that I don't think the other endings will match up to that level. Otherwise, the backgrounds, character sprites, and musical tracks were great! Although, the bird sound effects seemed too loud and overpowering for a simple scene, and the characters seem too small compared to the bigger backgrounds. That could just be my own little nitpicks, though. The one thing that did confuse me, though, was how the default heroine's name was Marty, since I believe that's predominately a male name and not a unisex or female name, but I could be wrong. All in all, it was a good game with a succinct story that didn't overstay its welcome. The menus and transitions also added to the charm of the game, too! Good job!

Hey, great asset! I bought him around the time it came out. I did notice a spelling error, though. It says,  "Terraformers - Botanits Specialist Neo" instead of "Botanist", I believe. Otherwise, great work! 

Hey, I used your other music in my most recent game and credited you, of course, with a link back to this page. Thanks again, and you can find and play my game here if it interests you:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/woman-in-red.

Hey, thanks for these amazing backgrounds and lovely assets! I used them in my most recent game and credited you, of course. Thanks a bunch! You can find and play it here if you're interested in doing so:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/woman-in-red.

Hey, thanks for the colorful and cute city background! I used it in my most recent game. You can check it out here:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/woman-in-red.

Thanks for the old man! I used him in my most recent game. You can check it out here: https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/woman-in-red.

I used her in my most recent game. Thanks! You can check it out here:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/woman-in-red.

Hey, thanks for these ambient cricket noises! They helped bring my woodsy walking simulator to life that I made in Godot. You can check it out here:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/into-the-woods.

Hey, thanks for these assets! I used one of the tree assets for my wooded walking simulator in Godot. You can check it out here if you want:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/into-the-woods.

Hey, thanks for this amazing 3D model! I used her in a walking simulator I made in Godot. You can check it out if you dare:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/into-the-woods.

Hey, thanks for this wonderfully boyish cutie of a sprite! I used him and some of your other character sprites in one of my more recent visual novels! You can check it out here if it catches your fancy:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/dinner-conversations.

Hey, thanks for these spooky forest backgrounds! They perfectly fit for what I was going for in my psychological horror visual novel! You can check it out here if it piques your interest: https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/scorpio.

Hey, thanks for these cyberpunk industrial backgrounds! I used one of them in my psychological horror visual novel, and the background fit the scene perfectly! I credited you as well, and you can check it out here if you're interested: https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/scorpio.

Hey, thanks for these beautiful and lively backgrounds! I used one of them in my futuristic visual novel and credited you as well! You can check it out here if you're interested: https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/scorpio.

Hey, thanks for these sci-fi and futuristic backgrounds! I used them in my sci-fi and psychological horror of a visual novel! You can check it out here if it piques your interest: https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/scorpio.

Hey, thanks for these cool and abstract backgrounds! They worked well for the intro of my psychologically dark visual novel! You can check it out here if it interests you: https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/scorpio.

Hey, thanks for the amazing character sprites you provide for the gamedev community! I used this character as well as others in one of my recent games. You can check it out here if you're interested: https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/scorpio.

Hey, thanks for these amazing and wonderful soundtracks! I used one of them to fit the mood of one of my recent games! You can check it out here if it catches your fancy: https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/butterfly-catching-game.

Hey, thanks for these wonderful and amazing backgrounds! I used a bunch of them in my butterfly catching game! I made sure to credit you, and you can check out the game here if it strikes your curiosity: https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/butterfly-catching-game.

Hey, thanks for this GUI template! I only used the textbox, but I made sure to credit you and explained any edits I made to it in one of my recent games. You can check it out here if it piques your interest: https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/butterfly-catching-game.

Hey, I made a butterfly catching game with your butterfly assets. Thanks!

This is the link to it if you want to check it out: https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/butterfly-catching-game.

I liked the look, story, music, gameplay, presentation, and overall color scheme of this visual novel! 😁

I was still able to understand it, in spite of not playing through the previous game. Good job! 

Gotcha. It might be easier to hire freelancers to commission custom art, to use assets, or to collaborate with artsy friends than find a publisher nowadays. That’s what I’ve done anyway. For future visual novels, Ren’Py might be a better bet than Visual Novel Maker. 

Furthermore, it’s better to write a visual novel as a screenplay than a full-on descriptive book due to the visual nature of the medium and thus not needing to say as much, for less is more. You can also consider making a bunch of short stories and self-publishing them as an anthology or self-publishing a visual novel on here or on Steam, whether it’s an updated version of this story or another one. 

Both game developers and aspiring authors struggle with getting publisher deals. So, don’t be afraid to take a bet on yourself. Otherwise, if you can’t get beta readers or playtesters, proofreading and playtesting out a story and visual novel yourself can be important before submission to make sure everything is readable and working. Finally, game jams and feedback from family and friends can also be a good way to gauge interest and product viability. 

Sorry for the harsh criticism in my original post, by the way, but I tried to be constructive so that you can succeed next time around, whether it’s updating this visual novel, making a new one, or creating other stories in general. So, good luck with any and all future creative endeavors. 

I managed to get as far as I did in this visual novel, and here are my thoughts.

I don't know about the Windows or OS builds of the game, but I couldn't open the Mac build of it by simply downloading the game on the itch.io website. That sucked, considering I downloaded that as a last resort, since the Mac version on the itch.io app worked but ultimately soft locked me into a black screen by the end of chapter 9 and the beginning of chapter 10. I know this because I found out that this visual novel was an adaption of the book with the same name that the author posted on Wattpad for free. Thus, I had to go on Wattpad to read the rest of the story, but it was only the last two chapters. So, it wasn't too big of a deal.

The story actually ended up being very wholesome and sweet by the end of things, and I think this story works better as a Wattpad book rather than a visual novel because of how wordy this story was, and I don't think cutting out unnecessary descriptions was taken into account when converting this story from a text-based medium to a visual one. This visual novel would bore me so much that I had to put it down a few times. Yet, because of how far I got into it, I didn't want to completely abandon it. I felt as though the story picked up at chapter 9 where things started getting really interesting, but that was also late in the story, too. The story does get kinda kooky too with its more supernatural and paranormal elements. One character reminded me of an Earthbound enemy, except it was black and not white. 

I also didn't like how much cussing there was in the story, especially from the goth girl. She was trying to act and sound cool but wasn't. Not only that, but the author pointed out stereotypes that the goth girl could also have because she was goth in the beginning of the story from the fears that the protagonist had or the rumors he heard from other students, only to make a few of those true. I wasn't a fan of that. That could be considered foreshadowing, but it also comes across as negative reinforcement of bad or harmful stereotypes that she could have broken to show that just because she looks different, that doesn't mean she has to act or be a certain way. I don't know. Maybe that's just me.

Furthermore, the art is clearly A.I.-generated, but it's not tagged as A.I.-assisted in terms of graphics on here, but it is tagged as such on the Visual Novel Database. So, there's that, at least, but I dislike the lack of transparency here. I probably wouldn't have read this if this was tagged as A.I. for its graphics, but I wanted to give it the benefit of the doubt, even though I knew I could tell from the get-go from the cover art, title screen, and some of the characters, too. Not only that, but the characters only had one facial expression, and the backgrounds were inconsistent in art style. The school hallway one looked off when I looked closely at it, and the nature backgrounds looked like they were in the season of spring when it was supposed to be winter. Although, it was apparently April in the VN. So, I can understand how they're transitioning from one season to the next.

Plus, the one CG where a character was foaming at the mouth, his mouth was foaming, but his eyes were big but not afraid or rolled over. There was no emotion in his eyes. That goes to show that A.I. can produce what it's told but not have any intentions whatsoever when generating things that a human would have when creating things because A.I. cannot think or observe on its own. Thus, it cannot create, only generate. Another big dead giveaway of this is how there was a realistic photo-like image of a character outside, and that greatly confused me. I doubt the developer took a picture like that himself or found the exact image of that character from behind in an aerial view magically on the Internet. The only logical conclusion was that the image was A.I.-generated.

Otherwise, I don't think the story itself was A.I.-generated with its typos and curse words. There were a couple of typos here and there, but it didn't interfere with the reading experience too much. The story was well thought-out, and it does end sweetly and happily. I would have liked to have seen the ending in the visual novel itself instead of having to go onto Wattpad to read the rest of it, and I would have given it an extra star if that was the case. Yet, since I couldn't load my save files, since I couldn't rollback at all, since the load times were long, since the history log started at the beginning of the chapters or sections instead of at the last lines of dialogue or narration, and since the Mac build was ultimately unplayable near the ending of the story, I have to rate this visual novel a 1 out of 5 stars. Save yourself the headache and just read the Wattpad version yourself or don't. This should have been made in Ren'Py if it wasn't because a lot of quality-of-life features were disabled or nonexistent in this VN.

May the developer grow and learn next time if he were to make another visual novel again. This is why playtesting is important. Integrity is, too. Otherwise, I give this story a 7/10 in spite of its many flaws. I liked what the characters learned at the end of the day, and such lessons surrounding acceptance and accountability are good ones to promote and live by every day. Good job on that front there. The story isn't necessarily bad. It's good. The presentation and execution of it as a visual novel could be worked upon, however. It also needs proofread, but that's a minor flaw. 

It may not be perfect, but I commend the effort to convert a story into a visual novel, as I know it takes a lot of work to do so. I know so because I make visual novels in my spare time as a hobby, too. I'll admit, too, that I use A.I. as well but for code or for checking grammar, not for writing or art. So, I'm not entirely against the usage of A.I. Yet, the way in which it's used here can be seen as cheap or unethical. I think A.I. can help assist creatives and people in general, but should it be used to generate pictures or books? I don't think so, since people couldn't copyright such content because it's not theirs and because A.I. simply steals from people and data from across the Internet. So, it does beg the question if A.I. is fair or ethical to use or not. Maybe I'm just a hypocrite? Who knows, but if you aren't afraid to tell and share your story, then you shouldn't be afraid to create and share your own art either, even if it's bad. Mine is bad, but that doesn't stop me. Imperfection shouldn't stop you either.

I liked the explorative nature of the game. I was able to find 16 things in total. I was also able to jump on a character, travel around the top of the walls, and I jumped and fell away from the town and ended up stuck in the blue sky. So, I think I did everything I pretty much could do in the game. Good job!

This was super cute! I love the pastel aesthetics and peaceful vibes of the game! I also liked how each ending was heartwarming and positive, too! Keep up the good work! :)

I liked the art and atmosphere of this game. Their conversation surprisingly flowed together very well with all of the different choices I made. The ending I received was also heartwarming and wholesome! Keep up the good work! :D

Hey, this was a very cinematic visual novel! I liked the care and thought put behind the main menu, game menu, and visual novel itself. The neutral 3rd ending was my favorite. The music and sound effects were also a nice touch that added to the overall atmosphere to the game, too. 

Although, it was a bit disappointing that two choices lead to the same ending. It would have been interesting if the protagonist actually pushed the potential love interest out of the carriage itself to see what would have happened in such a circumstance. However, I still liked it and gave it a 4/5 stars, as it was a short and haunting experience.

Furthermore, even before I played this, I decided to contribute to reach the rest of its monetary stretch goal. I don't know if it will be for this visual novel, your up and coming project, or for personal use, but regardless for whatever reason, I'm always happy to help fellow indie game developers. :D

Keep up the good work! :)

Hey, thanks for these cool and colorful backgrounds! I used them in my latest visual novel. I also credited you and added a link back to this page as well. You can check it out here if you're interested:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/suzys-day-at-the-beach.

Hey, thanks for these cute character sprites! I used her in my latest visual novel! I also credited you and added a link back to here as well. You can check it out here if you're interested:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/suzys-day-at-the-beach.

I did notice their acknowledgment of the power dynamic in the beginning. Yet, towards the end, I felt like Harriet blamed Kenzie for her actions instead of realizing that she may have been taken advantage of in that situation. Although, because of that, it may have also contributed to why the endings played out in the way that they did. 

Hey, thanks for these amazing soundtracks once again! I used your song Peaceful Sky in my most recent slice-of-life visual novel, and it fit the mood and the atmosphere perfectly! I also credited you and added a link back to this page here. You can check it out here if you're interested:

https://activedaydreamer.itch.io/sunflowers-and-pink-sunsets.