Play game
The Amethyst Throne's itch.io pageRate this game
In order to rate this submission you must be logged into itch.io and have submitted your own entry. Anyone with an account can leave a comment.
Leave a comment
Log in with itch.io to leave a comment.
Comments
Brother Coen vibes are powerfull here. This looks like a fantasy fargo game in a way. This shows how a cultivetad Author doent means boring or pedantic Works!
Wow. Thank you for the kind words! This is what I was going for so it’s great to hear. I plan on making it easier to run by highlighting the important bits and make the ending a bit more open ended after the jam.
Very surreal, almost gonzo and loose, clearly had hidden references and meanings I missed but still appreciated! Felt like I was at a trailer park or farm looked at through the eyes of someone on acid seeing it like a dungeon.
What I thought worked well
What I think could be improved
This has a very nice pulp feel to it, especially the map. It seems like it would be fun to run at the table, with an interesting premise, sprinkled humor and weird creatures.
I would examine your gold values a bit more. 50 gold for a king wanting his sons back, 30 for a magic weapon and 15 for a Golden Canister encrusted with Emeralds is very low. And making some words bold besides enemies, like items or rooms would help since your locations have a lot of text.
Cover: The layout and typography is pure Appendix N. I like the image of the throne and the way the same colour palette is used for the background.
But who is the guy on the throne? It looks like he wandered in off the set of Trainspotting. Is that a joint between his fingers? Is this fantasy or social realism?
Interior layout: Overall fonts, colours, layout work quite well, it definitely has a zine vibe to it. White text on blue background is very easy to read, but black text is not high-contrast enough.
Map: very clear and I love the hand-drawn illustrations. Again it says zine to me. I did the same thing as you, putting the map and location descriptions on the double-page interior spread and detailed stat blocks on the back page.
Editing: some of the text would benefit from reordering/reorganisation. e.g. “Roots” describes legs sticking out, then the plant, then “his head and hand have been dissolved”. The spectacles in room 4 should be mentioned in the description for room 1. “Throne Room” describes Cadwin, then frog-people, then Cadwin again. There are a few typos (spelling/punctuation).
Adventure: It’s a classic setup, a quest to learn the fate of the king’s sons.
You succeed in creating a whimsical ambience which I imagine would be a lot of fun to play. Some of the encounters combine whimsy with deadliness, which means that it’s not too predictable. The party are kept a little off-balance and have to have their wits about them.
I love the pamphlet with tips for self-esteem.
Overall, this looks like a quirky and fun one-shot adventure. Nice work!
Thank you so much for the detailed , actionable feedback.
It’s interesting that you found the white easy to read, when most did not. Maybe I need to choose a better font and not use the black type unless I use a background behind it to make it pop. Great to hear because I like it too. The idea was to use the blue from old school maps.
100%. Yeah the cover is unfinished. I assume it’s a cigarette. LOL. It’s a public domain photo from a museum. I need to add my sources to those. I will be collaging in more Dnd details to him. Tall boots. Leather armour details. Perhaps a helmet. Also his legs need work.
Glad you like the map. I have revised it to pop more.
OMG. The typos are not my usual, but I was making changes at the last minute. I’ve edited but didn’t want to upload in case it’s not allowed.
Very flattered it’d be fun to run. Hard to know how twist and turns will be perceived by a reader/ player.
Great points and very much appreciated!
I am a big fan of your entry as well.
One more thing I liked but didn’t mention in the review: the environmental storytelling aspect.
I use that in my own writing and I always enjoy how it plays out at the table, as the players get bits and pieces of the story in some order and start to put it together.
I’m glad the feedback was useful!
Fun adventure, blissfully purposeful furnitured without the need of random wandering encounters disturbing this absurd cast of characters.
It gives Monty Python vibes, but that could be me reading it into the text.
I wonder: is this meant to be played on the funny side?Like hitting of the absurdness of the princess deaths? In that case this could’ve gotten a sentence per prince more, but I’m willing to improvise.
Overall an off-the-go playable, dangerous but fun module with a ton of absurd role-play potential.
Hey Thanks! I’ve received other feedback regarding the princely deaths. They are meant to be black comedy ala Coen Brothers movie / Fargo show. I maybe should elaborate and try to reveal the sequence of events that led to their demise in an interesting way. (Clues / environmental story telling) The ring of intelligence was meant to suggest that the prince was dim. It also reveals that there is trap to be dealt with. The self help pamphlet Prince was insecure, the stairs Prince was clumsy. It could be a chance to reveal their character was my thinking. Pushing it further would be fun. I think Monty Python is accurate. Could this be played straight? I am probably violating the “Between Two Cairns” podcast preference for letting the players make the jokes. I aim to create adventures that are surreal, satirical, and are easy to run. I want to polish them to the point where they have an environmental story, so your idea will definitely be implemented post jam. I appreciate the thoughtful feedback!
Uh. Fargo is a great interpretation to run this. Thanks :)
I liked the color choices & hand-drawn map. The twist about the Amethyst Throne’s true purpose slaps! As do the annoying, but oddly endearing NPCs- fun personalities on those guys!
I wish the princely deaths had been expounded upon a bit more, and that the loot were a bit more valuable in order to compensate PCs for the risk this adventure entails.
Thanks for the kind words and suggestions. I will definitely do both when the Jam is over.
I think the conflict is great; the princely “sacrifices” and the prince possessed, on the throne, but unwilling to leave his impending possession, is rife for conflict. I’m a little confused, though, as to why this secret is meant to be “shared freely” with the party before they enter—how was that information retrieved? And does it make for a better game, to let the party know that before, or for them to figure it out as they go into the dungeon?
I agree with what others have said about black text on a mid-tone blue background, but I wanted to underline how lovely I think your map is. It oozes personality, in particular Polyphemus and the legged cricket. Good entry!!
Thanks for asking. I was thinking that Hugh might give the adventurers a heads up if they engage with him and put up with his unending favor requests. I do need to think about whether that adds anything though. probably not. The idea is that you see the prince and present the scroll so you are invited to engage with his entourage before things get hostile (or don't) Most people enjoyed the twist that have commented here. I also realized that I did not define that once the Prince's life force is drained, he ______. I went back and forth about whether the prince becomes the demon lord or whether Caractacus just drains his life force. Could be that he becomes a zombie or abomination. But in this version I kept the weird monsters separate. I was hoping Polyphemos may steal the scroll from some parties. Also I meant to convey that the other princes died due to being incredible dim.
I quite enjoy the map and the choice to use a photograph for the cover was a really neat one! If I could leave some feedback, it's that the choice to use black text over a blue background made it less easy for me to read. I do like the yellow circles for the bullet point numbering though. Those really stand out.
Thank you! I am 100% going to revise for readability after the Jam based on everyone’s feedback. I appreciate the feedback. I also plan on polishing the map and adding some more collage photos like the cover for the “weird” monsters. My map last year was more polished aesthetically, and I want to build on that. Did you mean the game design aspect of the map or the look? Also always like to ask if there’s a weird or (meant to be humorous) element that does not fit the tone?
Honestly I thought the whole thing is charming but the map especially stood out as particularly fun.
awesome thanks. y. I plan to keep the vibe of the map, just fine tune it a bit.
Love the visual style and weird vibes. Unfortunately I think I'd find this hard to run in this format, as I have a hard time reading and distinguishing portions of it. The thin black text on blue is just a bit tough on my eyes. Still very cool, though!
Thanks for the feedback. I will fix this for sure. Maybe fade out the blue of the map so it’s not under the text and use all black text. I am going to get some editing too!
The challenges and monsters are delightfully weird, the flow through the dungeon seems quite interesting, and some of the items and encounters actually made me chuckle.
If there’s one thing I’d nitpick is that it would’ve been nice to have more encounters that make it explicit that the throne is cursed before you get to the throne room. There are many interesting side-characters that could lead to fun interaction there, but I feel like I don’t know how I’d set that scene up in a way that the PCs wouldn’t resort to violence right away as they figure out what is happening. Maybe I would run it as if the party just barged into a dinner and got invited to it.
Great feedback. I was thinking Hugh would be a good source but I can see upon reading it that it could be more explicit. Maybe some glyphs and other environmental clues. I also think a wandering monster table with more obviously hostile monsters (new faction?) would add some stakes / fun. I need to think about this issue some more. I meant the throne’s true nature to be a twist, as in those who inhabit it live on through Caractacus. I need to polish the coherence for sure. Luckily I have some pals that offered some editing.
The map is my favorite piece of visual design here but the rest of the project manages to feel very authentic to the 70's - owing to subtle use of textures and a great font choice.
It's proper weird in just the right way and the creatures in particular, !Polyphemus!, are a joy.
Layout/formatting is where my only nitpicks come from as some of the blocks of text don't have anything to draw the eye to pertinent information, rather you just need to read them front to back and maybe more than a few times if you're anything like me.
Your feedback is on point. I actually really enjoy nerding out about usability, but 100% did not implement! I’m so happy you dig Polyphemus. I was tempted to give some examples but would need to take some time to make sure they were worth including.
I think you have everything you need for a little update post jam and I hope you do! I'll be watching my feed.
Heya,
I'm working on organizing a collaboration between all of the Shadowdark creators from Appx. N Jam. If you're interested find me on the SD Discord or msg on bsky.
Thanks! I’ll head over to discord.
A shadowdark adventure! This looks cool, I love the ideas, all the weird creatures you put in there. It feels very magical. And the plot twist is great~!
super flattered. Yours is beautiful and very evocative so it’s great to hear. I’m going to polish things up visually and add some weirdness after the jam. Didn’t have space for a wandering monster table but after tightening the prose a bit and maybe adding a few pages I’ll have space for more weird. Thanks!